What the latest laundry wheeze misses about self-help

Daniel Hambury
Melanie McDonagh3 April 2023
WEST END FINAL

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THERE is no more optimistic bit of a bookshop than the self-help section.

I am a sucker for the genre — for £16.99 you too can uncover the Seven Habits of Highly Successful People (though one of those habits may be the ability to read turgid prose). It’s the simplicity of the thing that appeals; a few simple rules, one for each chapter, usefully summarised at the end: master these and bingo! A new You!

The most seductive element of the modern genre is the idea that if you can deal with your domestic chores, then happiness follows. The latest is a chirpy book from Penguin — very mainstream, then — called Life, Laugh, Laundry (if it sounds like Eat, Pray, Love, that’s probably intentional), billed as “a calming guide to keeping your clothes clean — and you happy”. It’s the second bit which marks it out as self-help.

Merely practical guides to washing and ironing clothes have been around forever but Laura Mountford, a “cleanfluencer” with umpteen TikTok followers, tells us that “the somewhat basic task of doing the laundry has helped me through some challenging times. Whether it be stressful periods at work or feeling not quite myself, I find doing the laundry thereapeutic. I think of it as an extension of my self-care routine”. Alas, the promise isn’t quite fulfilled.

Mountford’s approach is practical, though I wouldn’t, myself, use her bio washing gels (the enzymes and phosphates are environmentally problematic) and I can’t say that I care much for her fave Lenor’s Exotic Bloom in-wash scent boosters. But it’s the absence of the philosophical element which means this doesn’t really cut it as a self-help guide.

The most genius exemplar of the happiness-through-domestic-calm trend is Marie Kondo (The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up) who not only presents you with a positively revolutionary means of folding clothes (items in your drawer should stand up!) but establishes a principle for your clutter-clearance: only keep things that spark joy. So if your tired vests don’t do that, out they go. For those who lack control over every other area of their life, controlling their sock drawer feels like autonomy.

I fear Live, Laugh, Laundry doesn’t cut it as a lifechanger. But I do recommend Mountford’s sage advice: Just Wash Less. That I can do.

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